That gray hair and wrinkles don’t hurt.
For great inventions, like toilets and remote controls.
That Friday is never more than seven days away.
For alarm clocks, especially the snooze and off buttons.
That my kids like when mac and cheese constitutes dinner.
For the ability to laugh, love and dream.

Ed and I had the opportunity to speak to foster parents in training last night, as we have done several times over the past couple of years. Catholic Charities is wrapping up a core training session for new foster parents, and we were invited to speak about our foster care and adoption journey. The new trainees’ interests included both traditional foster care and foster-to-adopt placements, and their preferred ages ranged from infants to teenagers. We enjoyed spending an hour speaking about our beautiful adopted children, discussing our various foster care and adoption experiences, and imparting our own words of wisdom on those who are answering the call for foster parents. I could sense the nervous energy and enthusiasm in the room, and I’m excited for these soon-to-be foster parents. To all who are embarking on their own foster care journey, I thank you for making an incredible commitment to kids in need of loving foster homes!

It’s National Foster Care Month, a time to heighten the visibility of foster care and salute all those who make a difference by serving as foster parents, relative caregivers, mentors, advocates, social workers and volunteers. May’s National Foster Care Month appropriately follows on the heels of April’s National Child Abuse Prevention Month, a time to raise awareness about child abuse and neglect, and encourage individuals and communities to support children and families. Far too many children in our country are victims of abuse and neglect, and when they end up in foster care, compassionate people are needed to make a positive impact on their lives.

National Foster Care Month originated in 1988 when the National Foster Parent Association persuaded the late Senator Strom Thurmond to introduce a resolution proclaiming May as National Foster Care Month, which in turn was proclaimed by President George H.W. Bush every year of his presidency. Today, Casey Family Programs leads the effort in partnership with other organizations representing over 250,000 individuals and providers. Their “change a lifetime” campaign spotlights the importance of permanency for the 496,000 children in foster care.

Ed and I aren’t foster parents for the recognition. While we enjoy an annual dinner celebration and other events this month, we don’t need to be recognized for our work as foster parents. And there isn’t money in foster care either. Foster parents are given a stipend to help offset the costs of caring for foster kids, but we are always (often by choice) out more money than we receive. We are foster parents because we believe there are good children out there who have been the unfortunate victims of abuse and neglect, and regardless of their past or family circumstances, we know that all kids deserve a childhood full of love, laughter and well-being. It’s our way of giving back - providing the kids in our care a safe and comfortable haven, a warm and loving home, and the chance to grow and flourish. We’ve also been blessed to build our family this way.

I’d like to acknowledge some people in our lives who share our commitment to foster children …

• The amazing foster care team at Catholic Charities, with us at every step of our journey.
• The wonderful case workers we’ve worked closely with in Denver and Arapahoe Counties.
• The judges, GALs and therapists who have changed the lives of our children for the better.
• My sister Molly, halfway to her MSW, and others in the next generation of social workers.
• My parents who are former foster parents, and my mom who is a current CASA worker.

It truly does take a village. And you can be one of the many villagers foster children need in their lives. In fact, there are so many more children in need of foster care than there are foster parents available today. Lots of online resources can help you learn about becoming a foster parent. I recommend starting with the NFPA or your state or local department of human services.

[Source: National Foster Care Month]

Today, we celebrated the one-year anniversary of Isaiah’s adoption. We went to dinner at Red Robin, got him a balloon and an ice cream sundae, and made an event out of it. We have always believed in celebrating adoption anniversaries. While a birthday signifies a child’s entrance into the world, an adoption day signifies a child’s “official” entrance into their forever family.

Adoption anniversary celebrations have presented us with an interesting challenge, however. The first one we celebrated was the one-year anniversary of Joanna’s adoption. On November 18, 2006, as we were enjoying dinner and making a fuss over Joanna on her special anniversary, Isaiah was being born in a hospital across town. We didn’t know that until three days later, though, when we got the call about Isaiah, a newborn baby who was being discharged from the hospital into foster care. How ironic that November 18th is now celebrated as both Isaiah’s birthday and Joanna’s adoption day. And even more ironic is the fact that November 18th was National Adoption Day in 2005, the day Joanna’s adoption was finalized. I always thought it was a sign that Isaiah was born on that special day. But it does present a challenge in celebrating both events on the same day now, especially because Joanna must feel like it was her day first.

On November 18, 2008, Isaiah received a bundle of birthday presents and Joanna received a special adoption day remembrance gift from us. Because what I know for sure is, regardless of what other events occur on November 18th or April 23rd, these days will always be - at least in part - cherished and celebrated as the two days our family officially grew larger by one.

This poem was inspired by a Hallmark card I came across, which read, “Are people giving you that ‘things get better with time’ B.S.? It’s shopping. Things get better with shopping.” Enjoy!

Retail Therapy

Went to buy an onion … came home with a whole lot more.
I needed a new pair of sandals. Instead, I bought four.

My pillows and towels and rugs are fluffy and fresh and new.
I even bought a big beach towel, for two. It’s blue.

Necklaces, bracelets and earrings are truly a girl’s best friend,
Especially when they’re dripping with diamonds from end to end.

You say a woman could possibly own way too many handbags?
I say not if they’re all adorned with Coach and Gucci tags!

Please don’t think I’m pretentious simply because I like to acquire.
It’s the calming effect of retail therapy that I so desperately require.

Now I suppose it’s time to put all my fabulous new treasures away
And dream about my next regularly scheduled retail therapy day!