New Advisory Board Member

Deborah Hamilton — Tue, 12 May 2009 01:40:15 +0000

I was recently asked to join the advisory board for the Denver Health Connections for Kids Clinic, a grant-based effort that enables the Denver Health and Hospital Authority to provide primary care health services to foster children in cooperation with the Denver Department of Human Services and the University of Colorado Health Sciences Center. All foster children in Denver County are seen at the Connections for Kids Clinic, and I have gotten to know the clinic’s medical staff by taking several foster kids to them over the past several years. My role on the advisory board will be to attend quarterly meetings and speak on behalf of foster parents by sharing my clinic experiences, voicing any concerns, and helping to discover ways to improve the clinic.

The invitation to join the advisory board came from the medical director at the Denver Family Crisis Center, who is also an attending pediatrician at Denver Health and The Children’s Hospital, and a professor of pediatrics at the University of Colorado. I am honored to have been invited onto the advisory board, and I am excited to begin lending my voice at the next board meeting.

Today I’m Thankful …

Deborah Hamilton — Sun, 10 May 2009 06:45:18 +0000

That gray hair and wrinkles don’t hurt.
For great inventions, like toilets and remote controls.
That Friday is never more than seven days away.
For alarm clocks, especially the snooze and off buttons.
That my kids like when mac and cheese constitutes dinner.
For the ability to laugh, love and dream.

Foster Care Speakers

Deborah Hamilton — Wed, 06 May 2009 09:00:48 +0000

Ed and I had the opportunity to speak to foster parents in training last night, as we have done several times over the past couple of years. Catholic Charities is wrapping up a core training session for new foster parents, and we were invited to speak about our foster care and adoption journey. The new trainees’ interests included both traditional foster care and foster-to-adopt placements, and their preferred ages ranged from infants to teenagers. We enjoyed spending an hour speaking about our beautiful adopted children, discussing our various foster care and adoption experiences, and imparting our own words of wisdom on those who are answering the call for foster parents. I could sense the nervous energy and enthusiasm in the room, and I’m excited for these soon-to-be foster parents. To all who are embarking on their own foster care journey, I thank you for making an incredible commitment to kids in need of loving foster homes!

National Foster Care Month

Deborah Hamilton — Fri, 01 May 2009 16:15:41 +0000

It’s National Foster Care Month, a time to heighten the visibility of foster care and salute all those who make a difference by serving as foster parents, relative caregivers, mentors, advocates, social workers and volunteers. May’s National Foster Care Month appropriately follows on the heels of April’s National Child Abuse Prevention Month, a time to raise awareness about child abuse and neglect, and encourage individuals and communities to support children and families. Far too many children in our country are victims of abuse and neglect, and when they end up in foster care, compassionate people are needed to make a positive impact on their lives.

National Foster Care Month originated in 1988 when the National Foster Parent Association persuaded the late Senator Strom Thurmond to introduce a resolution proclaiming May as National Foster Care Month, which in turn was proclaimed by President George H.W. Bush every year of his presidency. Today, Casey Family Programs leads the effort in partnership with other organizations representing over 250,000 individuals and providers. Their “change a lifetime” campaign spotlights the importance of permanency for the 496,000 children in foster care.

Ed and I aren’t foster parents for the recognition. While we enjoy an annual dinner celebration and other events this month, we don’t need to be recognized for our work as foster parents. And there isn’t money in foster care either. Foster parents are given a stipend to help offset the costs of caring for foster kids, but we are always (often by choice) out more money than we receive. We are foster parents because we believe there are good children out there who have been the unfortunate victims of abuse and neglect, and regardless of their past or family circumstances, we know that all kids deserve a childhood full of love, laughter and well-being. It’s our way of giving back - providing the kids in our care a safe and comfortable haven, a warm and loving home, and the chance to grow and flourish. We’ve also been blessed to build our family this way.

I’d like to acknowledge some people in our lives who share our commitment to foster children …

The amazing foster care team at Catholic Charities, with us at every step of our journey.
The wonderful case workers we’ve worked closely with in Denver and Arapahoe Counties.
The judges, GALs and therapists who have changed the lives of our children for the better.
My sister Molly, halfway to her MSW, and others in the next generation of social workers.
My parents who are former foster parents, and my mom who is a current CASA worker.

It truly does take a village. And you can be one of the many villagers foster children need in their lives. In fact, there are so many more children in need of foster care than there are foster parents available today. Lots of online resources can help you learn about becoming a foster parent. I recommend starting with the NFPA or your state or local department of human services.

[Source: National Foster Care Month]

Adoption Anniversaries

Deborah Hamilton — Fri, 24 Apr 2009 05:10:37 +0000

Today, we celebrated the one-year anniversary of Isaiah’s adoption. We went to dinner at Red Robin, got him a balloon and an ice cream sundae, and made an event out of it. We have always believed in celebrating adoption anniversaries. While a birthday signifies a child’s entrance into the world, an adoption day signifies a child’s “official” entrance into their forever family.

Adoption anniversary celebrations have presented us with an interesting challenge, however. The first one we celebrated was the one-year anniversary of Joanna’s adoption. On November 18, 2006, as we were enjoying dinner and making a fuss over Joanna on her special anniversary, Isaiah was being born in a hospital across town. We didn’t know that until three days later, though, when we got the call about Isaiah, a newborn baby who was being discharged from the hospital into foster care. How ironic that November 18th is now celebrated as both Isaiah’s birthday and Joanna’s adoption day. And even more ironic is the fact that November 18th was National Adoption Day in 2005, the day Joanna’s adoption was finalized. I always thought it was a sign that Isaiah was born on that special day. But it does present a challenge in celebrating both events on the same day now, especially because Joanna must feel like it was her day first.

On November 18, 2008, Isaiah received a bundle of birthday presents and Joanna received a special adoption day remembrance gift from us. Because what I know for sure is, regardless of what other events occur on November 18th or April 23rd, these days will always be - at least in part - cherished and celebrated as the two days our family officially grew larger by one.

It’s Shopping

Deborah Hamilton — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 03:00:35 +0000

This poem was inspired by a Hallmark card I came across, which read, “Are people giving you that ‘things get better with time’ B.S.? It’s shopping. Things get better with shopping.” Enjoy!

Retail Therapy

Went to buy an onion … came home with a whole lot more.
I needed a new pair of sandals. Instead, I bought four.

My pillows and towels and rugs are fluffy and fresh and new.
I even bought a big beach towel, for two. It’s blue.

Necklaces, bracelets and earrings are truly a girl’s best friend,
Especially when they’re dripping with diamonds from end to end.

You say a woman could possibly own way too many handbags?
I say not if they’re all adorned with Coach and Gucci tags!

Please don’t think I’m pretentious simply because I like to acquire.
It’s the calming effect of retail therapy that I so desperately require.

Now I suppose it’s time to put all my fabulous new treasures away
And dream about my next regularly scheduled retail therapy day!

Fact or Fiction - Cough CPR?

Deborah Hamilton — Sun, 19 Apr 2009 17:30:48 +0000

CPR and First Aid certifications are among the requirements for maintaining our foster care license. This weekend, I attended a training class to renew my annual CPR certification. I found this new piece of information shared by the trainer very interesting and worth passing along …

You may have heard a “myth” that if you’re all alone and you begin to feel faint, or your heart seems to be beating improperly, you can begin coughing forcefully to prevent yourself from losing consciousness. No myth there. It’s dubbed “Cough CPR” - and it’s absolutely true.

Patients in heart catheter labs have been told about it in preoperative instructions for years. During this procedure, when the catheter is slipped up into the heart, this irritation can cause the heart to go into fibrillation. There is about a 10-second window where the patient will remain conscious before slumping into cardiac arrest. The nurses will see this occur on the monitor and instruct the patient to cough repeatedly to convert them back to a normal heartbeat without the need for the electric shock from a defibrillator and to keep them from losing consciousness.

Here’s how to do it: A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must be deep and prolonged. The breath and cough must be repeated about every two seconds without let-up until EMS arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again. The deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs, and the repetitive forceful coughing squeezes the heart and keeps the blood circulating. The squeezing pressure on the heart also helps it regain its normal rhythm.

By knowing this simple procedure, you may be able to save your own life!

[Source: HeartSmart]

Goodbye, Sweet P …

Deborah Hamilton — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 04:00:40 +0000

We said goodbye to Baby P today. We brought Baby P home from the hospital as a foster child when he was only five days old, and after eight months, he has left us to live with his grandfather. It was the longest time we’ve had a foster child in our care and had to say goodbye, and it was a very emotional experience for us. I miss him already, we all do. And yet … we are so happy for Baby P and Grandpa and their new beginning together. I think they’ll both be fine.

And what a great success story! Baby P was only four pounds at birth and heavily drug-exposed. Until he was five months old, he couldn’t turn his head to the left because of a condition called torticollis. This eventually caused the back of his head to flatten on the right side, a condition called plagiocephaly. But with weekly physical therapy and monthly occupational therapy, both conditions improved immensely. He now has full range of motion in his head and neck. We also got him fitted for a helmet, which will help round out the back of his head over the next several months. He went from fussy all the time to smiley all the time, and from developmentally delayed to developmentally on track. He spent his last few days with us finding his way around the entire first floor doing the “soldier crawl” and pulling himself up to a kneeling position using the furniture. Baby P was a completely different infant by the time he left us today, so different from when he joined our family last fall. He has also had lots of time in recent weeks to start bonding with his grandfather, which will help ease the transition. Grandpa seems like a wonderful man.

I am so glad we opened our home and our hearts to this special boy. It has been rewarding to work with so many service providers, including two terrific therapists, an entire team of people who never faltered in their collective determination to ensure the health, development, safety and happiness of Baby P. Not only does it take a village to raise a child, it takes endless amounts of resolve, action and hope from all of the villagers to make a real difference in the child’s life.

People often ask me how we do this, take care of foster kids, welcome them into our home, bond with them, and then send them on their way. I’ll admit, it’s not easy. It’s impossible not to fall in love with each and every one of them. But it’s the success stories like Baby P and people like Baby P’s grandfather that make it all worthwhile. And we know there are others out there that need our help and love. Besides, like I tell Joanna, we can’t keep them all! Where would we put them?

For those of you keeping track, we’ve brought four newborn baby boys home from the same hospital - Isaiah in 2006 and three more in 2008. We’ve officially had five foster children. We adopted the first two, said goodbye to the next three. And yes, we’re anxiously awaiting number six! It’ll be another baby boy. All it takes is a phone call and a “yes” … and voilà … instant baby!

Goodbye, Sweet P! Just hearing your cute laugh echo in my head makes me smile. I’ll miss you!

Trampoline Vigilance

Deborah Hamilton — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 03:00:58 +0000

I am deeply saddened by a tragic accident I heard about last Friday. A four-year-old foster child from Denver died when he became entangled in trampoline netting at his foster home in Colorado Springs. The boy was left unsupervised momentarily while the foster mother went inside to make lunch. She sent the boy’s three-year-old sister out to get him, and when he wouldn’t come in, the foster mother went outside and found the boy strangled by a loop in the netting.

As parents, we do everything we can to protect our children. As foster parents, we are required to take certain measures to protect the children in our care. Ed and I have child locks on our kitchen and bathroom cabinets, a lock on our medicine cabinet, a fire escape ladder in an upstairs bedroom, and a whole list of other childproofing measures that we must keep in place in order to retain our foster care license. Even so, we acknowledge that we can’t always fully protect our children from all harm. I understand that accidents can and do happen, and they truly are accidents, even the most tragic ones. But I also believe that certain accidents can be avoided.

Consumer Reports lists trampolines as the number one product not to buy for kids. Tens of thousands of trampoline-related injuries result in emergency room visits every year, and at least six deaths have been reported since 1990. Children playing on trampolines should be supervised with the same level of vigilance given to children’s water-based activities. Please don’t allow young children around trampolines, especially without ample supervision. There are so many other ways kids can have fun and get exercise that don’t pose such a serious threat to their safety.

My heart goes out to the birth family, who grieves for their child. And while I consider her actions at least to some degree negligent, my heart also goes out to the foster mother, who has suffered the loss of a child in her care. As a parent and foster parent, I can think of nothing worse.

M-i-c-k-e-y M-o-u-s-e

Deborah Hamilton — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 16:00:48 +0000

Disney World '05

Ed and I took the kids to Playhouse Disney Live last night. We had awesome sixth-row seats. The gangs from Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Tigger and Pooh, Handy Manny and Little Einsteins sing and dance, and the story line brings them all together at a clubhouse party. It’s cute and well-done, and the audience participates. It’s definitely for young children, although Joanna knows all the Playhouse Disney shows from watching them on TV with Isaiah, and she had a great time, too. I’ll admit that I spent more time watching my kids’ reactions to the show than watching the show itself. Joanna sang and danced, while Isaiah sat mesmerized, barely blinking or moving a muscle for 90 whole minutes.

Disney World '06

We’re taking the kids to Disney World in August. We’ll be staying on Disney property, which I think is the only way to go. When Isaiah was only six weeks old, we brought him to Disney World for our weeklong New Year’s vacation with my sister’s family. I’m convinced he was the youngest child there, and he spent most of the time sleeping in the stroller and the Snugli. Of course, Isaiah is at a great age this time around. He recognizes and names all the characters, so we’re planning on doing character dining. Joanna is still into the Disney Princesses, although she’s beginning to trade them in for the likes of Hannah Montana. I’m glad we’re squeezing in this trip - her third one - this year.

As for me, well, I’m a huge fan of everything Disney. I can’t wait!